Love is oftentimes thought of as an emotion or feeling that one falls in and out of at one's leisure. However, through my own limited experience I have found this to be untrue. Love is so much more than your fancy's inclination. It is rather a true desire of one's heart in conjunction with an act of one's will. It is often not expressed in the stereotypical manner of sonnets and ballads, but in thousands of little inconsequential ways that go largely unnoticed.
Love hides itself in the small corners of our beings and pervades all that we do. Love is present when we are awakened in the wee hours of the morning to a sister who is suffering from the stomach flu and is in need of assistance. It is in every skinned knee that needs to be kissed. It resides in every friend that needs a sympathetic ear. It rests in every thoughtful deed that is done with no expectation of thanks.
Love outpours when we make the decision to put others before ourselves. Love is the unselfish desire for the welling being and happiness of another.
It is in this way that God loves us. God so desires our well being, both physical and spiritual, and our happiness that He sent His only son into the world to die for us. Above all things He wishes us to attain true happiness through sharing in His eternal perfection. His love for us is so great that the only thing He desires from us is our love, as imperfect as it is, in return.
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Beautiful reflections about love, my dear!
ReplyDeleteWhat I've been thinking of recently is specifically romantic love...I may have to write another blog post about this...Because, love in general is pretty clear cut. Making a gift of yourself. Yes. Got it. Good. Bueno. I can do that. (I mean, I often fail miserably while trying to do that, but in general, I understand that's what I have to do, and I attempt to do it, despite the mistakes I make.)
But what I don't understand is romantic love. I mean, I understand it. I just don't understand it...
I would be clearer about my thoughts were any clearer. I just find love in general to be more of a mystery the older I get. How do you find someone who loves you in more than just a "I love you because you're a human being and deserve love" way, or "I love you! You're awesome! You make my heart happy!" but in an "I loooooove you" way? And what makes someone love you in that way? I think at a certain point, you just have to make the choice to love someone, just recognize love, go for it, and not be scared, but then do your emotions follow suit? How do emotions figure into this equation? I guess that's my problem. I don't know how they factor into this mess. It's not very helpful to say: "Well, love is a choice," because, yes, amen, I agree. Love is a choice. And I make the choice to love everyone, but I'm not required to make the choice to love someone romantically. How do I know when to do that? The only guide I have is my emotions! I'm not going to just choose a random person to fall in love with-my emotions determine that. But how do I know my emotions are right?????
(cont'd)
ReplyDeleteDo emotions change? I don't think so. When people say that the emotions of love fade away with time, I think they're wrong. I think they're straight-up wrong. Yes, you won't always feel like you're head over heels in love with someone-that would be exhausting. ^_^ BUT, if you truly, truly love someone, you'll always love them in a different way than everyone else. You may not always *feel* it, but you'll feel it to be true. I know that I love my sister. I love her a lot, but I don't think about it everyday, all the time. But if you ask me about it, I'll go on and on and on about how awesome she is, how much I love her, the stupid, hilarious things we do together. And I might be moved to tears. It's very clear that I love her. It's part of the truth of my life. It's just not an option not to love her. I wouldn't be ME if I didn't love her. Some days I'm mad at her, or annoyed with her, or I may not be happy with her, but that doesn’t change the fact that I love her. That's gotta be the way it will be with romantic love. But how do you find that emotion with someone else? How? How, how, how? What comes first-the emotion or the choice to have that emotion?
GAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH
I don't know-I don't know-I have absolutely no answers...I'm just one big question mark. I guess "false love" or "infatuation" that is transitory and passing is when you love being in love with a person, but you don't care for them beyond that? You fall in love with love. But you don't really fall in love with them. Is that where people go wrong? But why don't you fall in love with them? Why? I'm mystified by the magic that happens which allows two people to find each other, feel the same way about each other, and then live happily ever after. Do you fall out of love when you discover someone's faults. I don't think so. Everyone has faults, and while that does make you less "love-able" in some sense, the very point of love is that it covers a multitude of sins-it is blind to those faults, or rather, takes them into account is my point...
P.S. Bottom line: I believe in falling in love. Period. I believe in all those mushy-gooshy romantic feelings: I'm never going to stop believing in them-it's just not gonna happen. :) The whole world may turn to cynicism, and I'll still be holding out for Westley. It's just the way I'm wired. I guess I just have to go with the theory that God made me the way I am- and I want romance, I want Darcy, I want to be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how. What are we supposed to follow besides these desires, these emotions? (Okay, okay, I know we have Faith and God and all that, but these don't offer a guide on WHO to love romantically.)
Question: Am I making sense?
Answer: No.
End of diatribe. :) :)
Desi!!! *hugs* Welcome to where I was several months ago. I think I may have some insights for you, though I can only speak from an experience that is not all the experienced.
ReplyDeleteThis is a topic deserving of another post. Shall I attempt? Or have I already shoved my foot too deeply into my mouth? ;-)
^Drop down the dew of your wisdom, Cece. I'm ready and waiting.
ReplyDeleteAnd, just to clarify, it's not like these thoughts depress me or weigh me down or cause morose feelings of any kind. :) In fact, it's almost the opposite-I'm full of awe at the mystery of love, and that's beautiful and exciting and well and good. :) There are just so many questions! So many questions...Maybe it's like the Trinity...love gets more incomprehensible the more you learn about it...
Well, considering that God is love, I think you may have hit the nail on the head.
ReplyDeleteBasically, though you nailed my thoughts on love exactly -- love obviously isn't just a feeling, it is a choice, yet at the same time you do get these emotions when you do love someone. But at what point do you begin to love someone? I sense a whole 'nother round of pie nights and slumbies on the topic... :D