Ladies and Gentlemen...

...may I present Miss Jane Austen! While perusing one of my favorite blogs I quite inadvertently stumbled over this lovely article about why the world needs Jane Austen. More specifically it concerns itself with the examples of true gentlemanlike, as well as ladylike, behavior that Austen illustrates in her characters. As any Janite knows not all of Austen's characters are mannerly and amiable slaves of the social dictates of Regency England. She infuses her stories with a colorful cast of rascals, rakes, snobs, bombasts, twits and last, but certainly not least, those who are truly good. With these characters Austen draws for her readers a very distinct picture of the roles that men and women should play, and the many ways in which one can miss the mark. She shows how to be a true gentleman or lady we must have a strong sense of the moral good, as well as a firm idea of duty, honor and modesty.

Why We Need Jane Austen

Dumbing Down Darcy

After a delightful, stimulating but intellectually difficult semester of Aristotle, Euclid, Plato, God and the likes, I prepared myself for a summer of mental marshmallow fluff (compared to the mental meat-and-potatoes of those intellectual giants). For me, a little chick lit goes a loooooong way, and I was about due for another bi-yearly installment. So, I scouted around the blogosphere and scored. Austenland, by Shannon Hale. Not only did I find chick lit, but I found chick lit that clearly had to do with one of my favoritest authors around. The book acquired, I settled down to enjoy myself, which I did. Up to a point.

Basic plot premise: Jane Hayes is a thirty-something New Yorker with an obsession for Mr. Darcy as played by Colin Firth in the 1995 adaptation. No mere mortal could live up to that ideal of manly perfection, and Jane's love life suffers. So, when her great-aunt Carolyn dies and leaves her an all-expenses-paid trip to an Austen-inspired resort, Jane hardly needs two seconds to agree. Austenland is a resort that caters to idle rich women obsessed with Austen and all things Regency. For a few weeks, they exist in 1816, living, for the most part, according to the social standards and technological limitations of the time (exceptions being made for modern bathrooms and makeup; cellphones not allowed). Actors are payed to romance the vacationing women, and Jane hopes she'll get a piece of the pie. But will this trip to Austenland allow Jane to kick her Darcy obsession for good? Or will she wallow in more daydreams of the perfect -- and perfectly unattainable -- Regency gentleman? This being chick lit, Jane gets more than just a brief Regency fling, and the novel does have some good things to say (more on those later), but first I'll flay it alive.

My first beef with the book is that it's chick lit. I like chick lit, in minuscule amounts administered at lengthy intervals. I think most women do. Who doesn't want to be the heroine, get the guy, and rub your opponents' faces in the dirt, at least every once in a while? But that's where my problem with these kinds of books starts. Even if the heroine is remotely life-like (and all too often she's model-thin, stunningly gorgeous, and has a closet larger than my bedroom crammed with the latest fashions), the story isn't.

I just have to come out and say it, unbelievable as it may seem, but life doesn't often dump all of these good things (clothes, looks, men, jobs, opportunities and talents) in your lap and wait for you to make your selection. Yes, chick lit is mostly escapist fiction. We want out of our daily lives and in on the perfect world presented to us in these books. But all too often this escapism leads to discontent with the lives we have. Don't get me wrong; I think our lives, as the lives of fallen humanity, are pretty pitiful, and we should always strive to be perfect as our Heavenly Father is perfect, but that's obviously a life-long mission, and that kind of perfection doesn't entail driving a Ferrari or living in a chic downtown apartment. And as for the men in the real world? They're fallen humanity, just like us, and they deal with a lot of the same faults, disappointments, temptations, and icky real-world issues that we do (we have our differences, but that's a whole 'nother blog post).

Which brings me to issue number two: although Mr. Fitzwilliam Darcy isn't real, ladies (and gentlemen, if you're reading this), he's so much more than Shannon Hale gives him credit for. Mr. Darcy is a wonderfully and realistically drawn character, and I deeply cherish the romance that Jane created between Elizabeth and Darcy. He deserves better than to be the prize at the end of a chick lit story. Henry Jenkins (or, as his Regency gentleman character is known, Mr. William Nobley), the Darcy-esque character of the story, is just that -- a door prize that Jane gets to take home with her at the end of her vacation. The real Darcy is so much more than that.

(Am I taking this too seriously? Probably, but two points: A) the copy of the book that I read included a study guide for pete's sake. You don't include a study guide with a book unless the book is worth studying. B) Any time you bring Austen and her works into a story, you'd better be prepared to go intellectual because that's what she is. Jane Austen did not write chick lit (this is why men are able to read her books); she put zing and thought and effort into what she penned, and that is not to be taken lightly. We may laugh at the opening line of Pride & Prejudice, but there are other universally acknowledged truths in her works that transcend the time in which she wrote them. A hundred years from now, people will still read Jane Austen; a hundred years from now, no one will know who Shannon Hale is.)

And there were good points: for one thing, Jane Hayes is obsessed with Mr. Darcy, not the latest celebrity heartthrob. She actually has standards for the men she dates, and they are standards based on a true gentleman. She's looking for a lifelong commitment, and most of the men she dates ("men" here being applied in a very loose sense) can't or won't give it to her. And eventually, she finds someone who meets those standards; she doesn't have to settle for less (they even want to have kids, albeit with the ever-stated caveat of "someday"). As far as chick lit goes, it's decent, enjoyable and clean.

But mixing Austen and chick lit? Mixing oil and water? I just don't know. Austen is so real and gritty (in a way, my friends; she doesn't rub her readers' faces in the crasser details of Regency life, but she does deal with reality). The idea of Darcy as a passive character to be won by a woman is inimical to the spirit that Jane imbued him with. In Elizabeth and Darcy's story, there is a beautiful give-and-take between the two of them that mirrors the romances of the real world. Elizabeth would be lost without Darcy, and Darcy's life would be far poorer without Elizabeth.

And, yes, Darcy is a fictional character. It's not healthy to be obsessed with a fictional character, even one as awesome as Mr. Darcy, especially as played by Colin Firth. But the spirit of Darcy lives on in the many wonderful, real but flawed gentlemen of this world. Why settle for a dream when you can have the reality?

On Chuck Norris and Mr. Darcy...

I've officially created the most cosmic title ever, and I don't think this post will ever be able to live up to it.

Nope. Not a chance.

Anywho, to get on with it:

I love me some Chuck Norris.

And I'm an Austen freak/a teenage girl/a Romantic with a literary bent, so I think all you intelligent gentlefolk can gather what my sentiments are concerning that literary hero known as Mr. Darcy.

I was in the throes of some bizzare and strange mood, and I decided to type into the Google search engine: "Chuck Norris Vs. Mr. Darcy." Don't ask me what my impetus was. Some Sudden Fit of Madness had overcome my psyche and was pulling me down into the Vast Wasteland of Insanity, and all that sort of thing.

But, lo and behold, I struck gold.
(^Is that a Seussian sentence or what?)

I found an excessively diverting website full of "Mr. Darcy Facts"!!!


Be still my wildly beating heart.



But soft, what words through yonder computer screen break?



I never had known bliss until that sight.


A silent, girlish shriek of pleasure and delight sounded in my mind when I beheld these "Mr. Darcy Facts."
(You know...like Chuck Norris "Facts"?...see 'cause its Mr. Darcy-- instead of--it's all clever and...stuff)

Who was the genius who thought these up?

Who could possibly be cosmic enough to contain such monumental geniosity?

The answer to these questions was clear. It's the supreme answer to all questions:


Chuck Norris.

Oooohhhh yeaaaah.

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth, and Mr. Darcy declared they were "tolerable."
(Oh no he di'n't! I can't decide if this is horribly blasphemous, or just plain amazing.)

Mr. Darcy was once accosted by a gang of ruffians. By the end of the tussle all involved had given him all they had, and gone out to get him more.

Mr Darcy made up the last digits of pi.

Mr. Darcy is the reason why Mona Lisa is smiling.
(PHF=100)(DCF=550)

Like Vin Diesel, Mr. Darcy killed a man with his teacup. Unlike Vin Diesel, Mr. Darcy had his pinky up.

These completely disarm me.

All I can do is laugh like a snurge and cry out: "More! More!"

P.S. This is a snurge.

From the Random Bucket...

Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Jane Austen

I was going through my old scripts the other day (because I was in a pensive mood-and I do that sort of thing when I'm in a pensive mood), and I found these little thoughts written in, around, and all over the pages and covers of my Pride and Prejudice Script. I haven't read these since May, but I think they merit a re-visiting...

Without further ado:

• Opposites attract, but they must learn to meet in the middle. (E.g., Lizzie and Darcy: Darcy is her soulmate, because they both need each other- he starts out cold & proud, Lizzie starts out immature-his coldness is melted by my "fine eyes", representing my character, which is on par, and every bit as strong as his. My immaturity (manifest in my rash judgement) is tempered by him. I grow up, he loosens up. I am searching for a soulmate- I refuse to settle for less. My character is attracted to Darcy's character-only when I discover his character to be good and true.)



• Prejudice comes from my [Elizabeth's] fierce loyalty-almost the same reasons as Darcy's failings. E.g. Miss Bingley is an obvious snob. Therefore, [Miss Bingley's]warning [about Wickham] (a true, good warning,) is disregarded because it comes from her lips. This is prejudice, because why should she not be correct, although she is a snob? But, how else is one to judge someone and their actions, and words than by one's previous knowledge of them?
  
  
• PRIDE--Choosing not to love out of fear. Out of fear of being rejected, of not being loved back.
  
  
• Just love! "A life lived in fear is a life half lived."
  
  
• To love was why woman was created. [Ed. Note: This was written in reference to Genesis, and how Eve was created to be a companion for Adam. Adam was told to "fill the earth and subdue it" (Genesis 1: 28), but Eve was made for Adam, because Adam was lonely. God said "It is not good for the man to be alone." (Genesis 2:18) So, what did He do? He made a companion for Adam; and since He's God, obviously He's going to give Adam the perfect companion. That perfect companion was Woman. How sweet/adorable/romantic/lovely/beautiful/mind-boggling/earth-shattering/"inconceivable!" is that? Honestly, I think that's just the best thing ever.]
  
  
• Strong characters are attracted by character, not [exterior] beauty. Eyes express strength of character-windows to the soul.
  
  
• People project what they are onto other people.
  
  
• Obstinancy is his [Darcy's] true failing-perhaps like mine[Lizzie's].
  
  
• I pride myself on being the opposite of Jane (she sees only good in others at all costs), but I pride myself on seeing all and having no qualms about criticizing it.[Ed. Note--Can I say I find it simply fascinating, delightful, delicious, and quintessentially ironic that Lizzie's real fault is pride! Truly, it is: Lizzie is a clever, intuitive girl-the cleverest and most intuitive in her circle of aquaintance. Therefore, there's a little, wee bit of pride-the knowledge that she is better than everyone else. She prides herself on her ability to read character, and her good judgment. She's spiritually on an entirely different plane than everyone else in her family and her friends, and she's fallen into the trap of pride-the mistake of thinking herself "a cut above the company," as a wise, dashing young gentleman once said. But by the end of the story, Lizzie is a much humbler character. She's still witty, clever, and vivacious; but she has learned wisdom and humility.]
  
  
• Lizzie's attraction to Wickham is a vital ( i.e., physical) attraction. Physical attraction is blind-it sees only one side of the person-the side that the person wants you to see, or the side that you wish to see.
  
  
• Lizzie feels a respect that can lead to love-one must have respect-gratitude. Lizzie does not love Darcy as yet; but then her physical and vital attraction is awakened by Pemberly. I see a beauty & splendor of Darcy's that can rival Wickham's glamour. Only when Darcy's character was proved good did his wealth become attractive."If gratitude and esteem are good foundations of affection, Elizabeth's change of sentiment will be niether improbable nor faulty." --P&P Chapter 46
  
  
• "Never had she so honestly felt that she could have loved him, as now, when all love must be vain." ---P&P Chapter 46
  
  
• "She began now to comprehend that he was exactly the man, who, in disposition and talents, would most suit her."---P&P Chapter 50
  
  
  So there you are. I love this story-it is arguably the greatest love story of modern English literature. Jane Austen wrote a masterpiece, and it never ceases to amaze me how much richness and beauty and Truth is contained within the pages of her book. P&P is one of the rare works that is a 'classic' in the full sense of the word-it's themes are universal, undying, and are at the heart of all our stories.
  
  

"Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it."---C. S. Lewis