College Teaches You More Than Math

(Now that finals have blissfully faded into the past-that-is-no-longer, I feel like I can finally post this)

One thing that college has taught me is that there are very few woman who are truly happy with the way they look. I am by no means thin, and I start seeing red a bit whenever somebody pats the fashion industry on the back for being "realistic" and including "curvy size eights" ::eyeroll:: When I was in high school, I looked askance at all of the thin girls I knew and thought bitterly that surely they must be happy -- they were thin for crying out loud!

Then I got to college, and listened to first my roommate, then the rest of the dorm moan about how fat and ugly they were. How could this be? This group of girls moaning about their weight included a beauty who ran a mile every day, my roommate who is curvaceous in the absolute best sense of that word and an assortment of sixes, eights and tens who were all perfectly healthy, curves and all. Maybe we weren't all in the best of shape, but we could hardly be labeled overweight, let alone obese. Seeing these girls (whom I regarded as pretty-near-perfectly-sized) just as unhappy with their figures as I was with mine astonished me.

Honestly, I don't have anything else very profound to say. We've all been sold a bill of goods* by the people behind the checkout glossies, and I can't imagine that attaining the nigh-on impossible ideal body that they present would make me (or anybody else) happy. As cheesy and trite and cliched and banal as it sounds, who you are on the inside really does matter more.

(No, duh, disclaimer: losing weight for reasons of health is a different kettle of fish from losing weight for the sake of societal pressures and conventions and fitting into the popular clothes)

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*You don't suppose the fact that fashion magazines are at least half advertisements has anything to do with this, hmm? Buy this face cream, that sweater, those boots, and be THIN! PRETTY! HAPPY! It's almost like they're businesses... ::le eyeroll::

The New Noblewoman

An intriguing look at a new online site, The New Noblewoman, which features posts on diverse topics ranging from Lars von Trier's Melancholia to the difference between high and low teas. It looks to be most inspirational and lovely.

Breath of Fresh Air

Brand new online magazine Dignitas looks like a nice rebuttal to the fashion magazines of the checkout lane. Go thou and check it out!

Eleanor R.

Because you can't ever have too many strong female role models. Roosevelt's biography just joined the hundreds of other books on my TBR list.

Strength: Part I

(NB: This is the first of a 3-part series, examining three pieces of literature with dual female protagonists and how their strengths complement each other by following archetypal patterns .)

Last summer, I re-read the Lord of the Rings trilogy. If you haven't read them, do yourself a favor, and read them. Your soul and heart with thank you for it. If you haven't visited them in a long time, why don't you stop by and call on them again. You'll discover new and exciting things in them each time you read. One of the chief themes that struck me this time around was the relationship- the differences, similarities, and connections between the two main female protagonists, Arwen and Éowyn. (Although, to be technical, I suppose that in the books Galadriel is more of a female protagonist than Arwen. And Galadriel definitely embodies female strength-she's the Wisdom figure. So, we'll touch on that as well.)

Many of the young women I know who are fans of the books find Eowyn the most attractive. Of all the woman role models in the Lord of the Rings, she's appears to be the most active and dynamic. Éowyn is a tom-boy's heroine. She gets out there with the men and gets the job done. However, Éowyn sacrifices a bit of her femininity doing so. Aragorn describes her as an iron maiden. She has steeled herself to endure the fate that faces Rohan. She's frozen her heart, for fear of being hurt. In the Houses of Healing, Éowyn fully recovers. Not only does she recover from her physical battle wounds, she unthaws. The love of Faramir nourishes and heals her-warms her heart once more. The love story between Faramir and Eowyn is so precious. He's not about to tame her-he simply pulls her over to his side. He sees this fierce warrior who, like any good mother bear, will fight tooth and claw to protect her loved ones. If he can win her heart, he knows that her loyalty will be forever his. And he melts her. She hardens herself riding into battle, and it takes the gentle sunlight of Faramir's love to melt the stone-cold statue and find the tender maiden underneath.

Éowyn is an example of the female archetype of the woman warrior. In times of great hardship and peril, a woman takes it upon herself to save. To protect. To challenge evil. Joan of Arc is a real-life historical example of this. Another literary example is Antigone, the heroine of Sophocles's tragedy.

Here's one main point that hit me when re-reading the trilogy: both women get what they want. That may seem unimportant, but it's not. It's highly unusual. Many characters never get what they want in books. Half the characters in Lord of the Rings don't get exactly what they want. For example, all Sam wants is to be with Frodo, and the saga ends with the two of them being sundered by a sea. Éowyn desires honor and valor. She sees her house falling into ruins, and it cuts her to the core. She longs for romance, for love, for brave deeds, a dire fight, fell adventures that will be remembered forever in song, and a life full to the brim.

Arwen wants one thing: Aragorn. To be with the man she loves. And her fight for him is one of endurance and patience. Women, like swans, excel at hunkering down and enduring hardships for long stretches. Swans migrate 3000+ miles. Women make it through 3+ childbirths. The power of women is the power to outlast adversity, to live through horrors, trials and tribulations, and endure it all with calm, equanimity and boundless courage. Calm and quiet, mystery and secrecy-these are at the core of classic feminine strength. Women are also much more relationship focused. Instead of striking out and winning glory and honor for herself, Arwen uses all her power to assist Aragorn on his mission. She is the perfect teammate-thinking only of the one she loves, and working with all her might to make sure he succeeds. She is generous enough to desire his success, because even his success is her happiness. Even though the price of this happiness is her death.

Arwen's more of a mover and shaker-the brains, not the brawn. And that's a crucial theme running through Lord of the Rings-mind over matter. The strength of her will is often remarked on. And there's little said about her, but one feels her power and her strength when she is mentioned. Hers and Aragorn's story is one of two individuals standing the tests of time. They have loved each other for so long. And Arwen is willing to face death in order to be with him. Like Éowyn, this woman has no fear of death. She would rather spend a lifetime with the man she loves than an eternity without him. That takes incredible quiet strength. She is willing to give her life for him. That is love.

Galadriel has a similar strength to Arwen's. She is wisdom and light. She is the Athena-like character in the story. Slightly removed from normal human emotions and passions. Goddess-like, tender and jovial, yet powerful and stern. In the Wisdom books of the Bible, Wisdom is often characterized as female or feminine. Galadriel is the archetypal Wisdom figure in the trilogy.

Recently, Mara and I were discussing Antigone, since I just read it in class, and was caught up in the amazing wondrousness of that play. We compared it to Pride and Prejudice, but as I revisited this blog post, I realized that all three of these pieces of literature have heroines that follow the same archetypes. Thus was born the idea of this series on femininity and feminine strength in literature. Stay tuned for more!

The Simple Joys of Maidenhood

Over spring break, I discovered this little lovely website. Okay, okay, a lot of these reasons are rather bizarre and kind of stupid, BUT I think the idea behind these jokes are valid. Girls (smart girls) bond over the awesome fact that they're girls. Silly girls spend their days griping about how the female sex has been oppressed by patriarchal society or some such nonsense. I don't even know. Okay, okay, I'm being too flippant. I should acknowledge there have definitely been societies throughout history that have been radically downright cruel towards women. And my heart burns with indignation. And there are women in Muslim countries who face untold atrocities, and my heart aches for them. And women who undergo stoning, or mutilation, or enforced rape are being violated and oppressed in the most disgusting and cowardly way possible. But that just proves how great it is to be a woman. Good men appreciate (albeit with a twinge of wry bemusement), and are rapt in awe. Evil or weak men want to bring down women and seek to oppress them. I think it's radically unfair to our Muslim sisters-and all women who face those dangers- to even pretend that we're oppressed. The majority of women in America are fortunate beyond our comprehension. We should be grateful, so grateful for the opportunities and freedoms that we have.

AND we should giggle with sheer delight and joy that we are women. (Heh. I just realized this blog post might not be the most relatable to the gentlemen who are part of this blog's readership. Whoops. Feel free to stop reading now if you want.

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Are you still reading? Awesome.)

Women are a community-a sisterhood. There are so many times I sit at lunch/dinner/coffee/pie with one of my nearest and dearest sisters of the heart and we bond over the fact that we are women, we love being a woman, and begin to list a thousand big and little things why being a woman is awesome. We have solidarity with each other, and when someone attacks our sisters, we bristle with unsounded wrath. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," you know. In fact, playwrights ever since Aeschylus have gotten what a force to be reckoned with an unhinged woman is. Clytaemestra is a ferocious, fascinating, remorseless killer who murders her husband, and has no qualms about taking an axe to her son's head. Euripides tells the story of Medea, who kills her two innocent boys in order to break her faithless husband's heart. Yikes. I feel as though I've digressed by ranting about these insane women, and I feel as thought they're not supporting my point that being a woman ROCKS. Whoops. Well, here's evidence that being a woman rocks. People make songs about it, so dude, there's gotta be something there. Rogers and Hammerstein penned: "I Enjoy Being a Girl," and then there's the classic "How Lovely to Be a Woman," which is one of my personal favorites. Kim sings: "How lovely to be a woman/and smile a woman's smile." There's some sort of delicious, intriguing and solely feminine mystique captured in a woman's smile. And in the very fact of being a woman means your something of a mystery. Mystery and secret are at the core of womanhood, which is why secrets mean so very much to girls. And when someone confides a secret to them, women hold it to their hearts-a bond forms between them and their confidante.

And beauty. Beauty is so, so important for a woman. We are called to bring beauty to the world. Although it is undeniable that men can be incredibly beautiful (I'm sure you ladies can easily think of several gentlemen that prove this point. Ahem.), women have a beauty all their own. I'm trying to attempt to explain it, but I feel like I will fall short of the endeavor. So I'm leaving that subject to sit and ruminate in our minds. We'll touch on that another day.

In conclusion, I enjoy being a girl. That's all this post really is- a thanksgiving and celebration for being a woman. There's nothin' like it, kids.

P.S. Also, stay tuned for a post coming soon-that's been in the works for 8 months now. Yipes!-about Arwen, Eowyn, and womanhood. See how nice a segue this post is for that post? Eh? Eh? Thanks for reading-now get off the computer and go enjoy your day. Bask in the sunlight. Take a walk. Sing a song. Dance in the grass. Feed some birds. Live life.

Catholic Women of the World, Unite!

While spending too much time on the internet today, I ran across this interview with Harvard's 2010 Valedictorian, Mary Ann Marks, who entered the Dominican Sisters of Mary, Mother of the Eucharist back in August. After spending the summer discussing femininity and our faith, she struck me as an example of both. It is also extremely interesting that, despite all the claims that the Church is misogynistic or that she stifles women, Marks is quite obviously a smart, well-educated woman who chose to accept her vocation -- she wasn't coerced or brainwashed.

The world could use more women like her. She is truly a strong woman of God.

(excerpt)

LOPEZ: You wanted to go to graduate school but discerned that God wanted something else. Why would you give up your free will like that?

MARKS: Part of the answer is that when Love asks you to be His spouse, you don’t quibble about the when and where. The other part is that anything worthwhile in life requires an ongoing, freely willed surrender of one’s freedom.